Learning to Lead: Part 1

I think I am finally learning to lead. I am humbled to say that but it is true. I spent the last two days leading our pastoral staff (eleven of us in total) on our yearly Fall retreat. What was my learning? Simply, it takes a lot of time, thought and prayer to lead an excellent meeting.  One can’t skim on preparing.  I know. I did for years. This was our best staff retreat in 21 years. Why? I think Ed Freidman said it well:  “The overall health and functioning of any organization (or ministry or sub-ministry) depends primarily on one or two people at the top, and this is true whether the relationship system is a personal family, a sports team, an orchestra, a congregation, a religious hierarchy, or an entire nation… It is rather that leadership in families, like leadership in any flock, swarm, or herd is essentially an organic phenomenon. And an organism tends to function best when its “head” is well-differentiated. The key to successful leadership…has more to do with the leader’s capacity for self-definition than with the ability to motivate others…The key to successful coaches is less how they “handle” the players than how they handle themselves.”  (Generation to Generation). I managed myself with a little greater skill and maturity (note the word “little”) We began with a day alone with God in silence and solitude. This was followed the next day when I shared my objectives for them as a pastoral staff for 2008-2009, a Henri Nouwen DVD, a sharing time about our excitements and dreams for the year (one by one), prayer, and a brief time on the calendar reviewing the upcoming year. For years I have tried to delegate the leadership of these meetings, leaned on others to allievate my anxiety, and fallen back on my gifts of vision-casting and teaching rather than take the time to manage my self and really think through my objectives and goals. It felt like too much work.   Let’s face it: leadership of our own lives, in any area, is challenging and difficult!  I think I’m finally getting it! Why do you think it might be true, or not, that “the key to successful leadership…has more to do with the leader’s capacity for self-definition than with the ability to motivate others?”