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Tag Archives: defensive

10 Ways You Know If It’s Your Shadow

Everyone has a shadow. Shadows are those untamed emotions and behaviors that lie, largely unconscious, beneath the surface of our lives that constitute the damaged versions of who we are.  They may be sinful; they may simply be weaknesses. Most importantly, they lie concealed just beneath the surface of our more proper selves. You know it’s your shadow when: You are defensive when someone corrects you or points out your flaws. You are triggered by a person, or circumstance, saying things you often later regret. You act out inappropriately when under pressure. You dismiss others when they bring up a difficult issue about you and your behavior. You keep doing the same thing over and over despite the negative consequences. You are angry, jealous, and envious – a lot. You do and say things out of fear of what other people think. You become busier when you are anxious rather than more reflective. You. Read more.

The False Self

The false self is pretending, consciously or unconsciously, to be somebody you are not. Defensive and superficial, it severely limits our relationships and our effective witness for Christ. The following is a brief inventory to determine how much of a mask, or false self,  you are wearing: I sometimes say “yes” when I really prefer to say “no.” I often need to be approved by others to feel good about myself. I often remain silent in order to avoid conflict. When I make mistakes, I feel like a failure. At times, I compromise my own values and principles to avoid looking weak or foolish. My self-image soars with complements and is crushed by criticism. I do for others, at times, what they can and should do for themselves. I am fearful and reluctant to take risks. I often go along with what others want rather than “rock the boat.” I compare myself a lot. Read more.

Your Body is a Major, not Minor Prophet

Geri and I like often remind people: “Remember, the body is a major, not a minor prophet.” For this reason, one of the most significant indicators that all is well with our souls, that we are in loving union with Jesus, is that every cell in our body is relaxed. Why? Our bodies often know before our minds the state of our souls. When our lives are out of control, our stomach gets knotted, our neck tight, a tightness fills our shoulders, our fingers close up into a fist, our body posture closes up. For this reason, it is number one on our list of top signs below. (Geri reminded me of a 13th sign that I had omitted in Tuesday’s blog. Please note that below). Top 13 signs of not being loving union with Jesus 1. I feel anxiety in the tenseness and tightness in my body.2. I am not present or listening. Read more.

Your Body is a Major, not Minor Prophet

Geri and I like often to remind people: “Remember, the body is a major, not a minor prophet.” For this reason, one of the most significant indicators that all is well with our souls, that we are in loving union with Jesus, is that every cell in our body is relaxed. Why? Our bodies often know before our minds the state of our souls. When our lives are out of control, our stomach gets knotted, our neck tight, a tightness fills our shoulders, our fingers close up into a fist, our body posture closes up. For this reason, it is number one on our list of top signs below. (Geri reminded me of a 13th sign that I had omitted in Tuesday’s blog. Please note that below). Top 13 signs of not being loving union with Jesus 1. I feel anxiety in the tenseness and tightness in my body. 2. I am not present. Read more.

Top Signs of Not Being in “Loving Union”

There are few more important questions for leaders today then to discern the signs of when we are, or are not, walking in loving union with Jesus. Like an oil light in a car, these signs serve as warning signs to slow down and adjust our lives. They will be slightly different for each of us, depending on our vulnerabilities. The following are the top 12 that call out to me that something is not in order in my work as a pastor/leader: Top 12 signs of not being in loving union with Jesus 1. I feel anxiety in the tenseness and tightness in my body.2. I am not present or listening intently.3. I feel pressure, with too much to do in too little time.4. I am rushing.5. I give quick opinions and judgments.6. I am fearful about the future.7. I am overly concerned with what others think.8. I am defensive and easily offended.9.. Read more.

Top Signs of Not Being in "Loving Union"

There are few more important questions for leaders today then to discern the signs of when we are, or are not, walking in loving union with Jesus. Like an oil light in a car, these signs serve as warning signs to slow down and adjust our lives. They will be slightly different for each of us, depending on our vulnerabilities. The following are the top 12 that call out to me that something is not in order in my work as a pastor/leader: Top 12 signs of not being in loving union with Jesus 1. I feel anxiety in the tenseness and tightness in my body. 2. I am not present or listening intently. 3. I feel pressure, with too much to do in too little time. 4. I am rushing. 5. I give quick opinions and judgments. 6. I am fearful about the future. 7. I am overly concerned with what others think.. Read more.