Tag Archives: God

Things You Need to Quit. Begin with #1

1. Quit Being Afraid of What Others Think 2. Quit Lying 3. Quit Dying to the Wrong Things 4. Quit Denying Anger, Sadness, Fear 5. Quit Blaming 6. Quit Overfunctioning 7. Quit Faulty Thinking 8. Quit Living Someone Else’s Life 1. Quit Being Afraid of What Others Think • I will not say “yes” when I really want to say “no” because I’m afraid the other person will be angry, sad or disappointed. I will quit agreeing with people if I really don’t agree with them. • I don’t need your approval to feel good about myself. I already have intrinsic worth and value as a human being because of God’s love in creating me and dying for me – I have nothing left to prove!

Clean Pain and Dirty Pain

Examples of dirty pain are found throughout Scripture. The Israelites wander for forty years in the desert due to their unbelief. Jonah finds himself in a stormy sea as he runs from God’s will. Abraham experiences years of pain after birthing Ishmael rather than wait on God. Much of our dirty pain in leadership comes from a failure to wait and listen to wise counsel. Hasty staff hires, half-formed plans, sloppy meetings, a turbulent spirit due to a failure to set boundaries, rushed sermons – are a few examples. We don’t learn in dirty pain because we are defending, denying, and avoiding. It is the pain of repeating the same mistakes. I know it well. Examples of clean pain are also found throughout Scripture. Jesus struggles with the Father’s will in Gethsemane. Paul’s pleads to remove a thorn in the flesh. Abraham climbs a mountain to obey God and sacrifice his son. Clean pain. Read more.

When Criticized, Remember:

The Desert Fathers in the 3rd to the 5th century, following the tradition of Elijah, Moses, and John the Baptist, fled to the silence of the desert to purify their hearts in order to see God. Ultimately, they sought to save the world, and the church, from idolatry. Their wisdom has endured almost 2000 years. The next time you are criticized or slandered, remember these words from Abba John: “One day when he was sitting in front of the church, the brethren were consulting him about their thoughts. One of the old men who saw it became a prey to jealousy and said to him, ‘John, your vessel is full of poison.’ Abba John said to him, ‘That is very true, abba; and you have said that when you see only the outside, but if you were able to see the inside, too, what would you say then?’ How very true.

The Christian Leader's Most Difficult Task

“But they soon forgot what he had done, and did not wait for his counsel.” (Ps. 106:13). In other words, they did not wait for “God’s activity in and around them to unfold” (literal translation of the Hebrew). They were in too much of a hurry. They allowed mistrust and impatience to blind them. This may be our most difficult task. Like my friends in 12 steps groups for alcohol and drugs, I remain in recovery as an “impatient leader” who will wrestle till I die with the slow, unfolding plans of God. God is shaping the work we do for Him as an expert potter. There is no way we can understand what He is doing from our limited perspective as clay. We must do our due diligence in strategic planning, thinking, and setting goals. At the same time, we must pray with an open hand and wait. God’s plans always take time. Read more.

Patient Leadership

Patience is a form of wisdom. Some things must unfold in their time. A child that rushes a baby chick to hatch ultimately kills it. The straining and process of birthing is God’s way to prepare the chick to survive into adulthood. In the same way, God rewires and forms us into our true selves in Christ, burning out that which does not belong to Him, through our slow sufferings and struggles. God’s process cannot be hurried. As Rilke says: “Have patience with everything that is unsolved in your heart, and try to cherish the questions themselves. Perhaps one day… gradually… you will live right into the answer.” Move towards your goals, but with a sacred patience. Prayerfully ponder the questions to which you have no answers. He will lead you into the answers.

Leadership and Differentiation: Part 2

I recently reviewed my journals from 2007 to 2013 to discern key lessons learned. Countless hours were spent alone, and with wise counselors, wrestling with my leadership at New Life and my own internal”demons” (Matthew 4:1-11). These are the top questions to which I repeatedly return to in prayer: What is success for me as the Lead Pastor? What is God’s unique shape for me? Feelings aside, what is best in the long-term for NLF? What might I be avoiding? Am I staying with the “uncomfortable” in order to get to the goals I believe God has for NLF? How much of my avoidance of difficult issues is driven by a need to be liked? Am I doing anything that soothes my anxiety but betrays my integrity? Am I making room for the space and time I need to provide overall leadership and guard the values and vision? Am I staying focused on the. Read more.

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