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5 Ways Your Family of Origin Is Undermining Your Leadership (Part 1)
Posted on: Tuesday July 08, 2025
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If you’ve ever found yourself stuck in patterns you can’t explain or hitting a wall in your leadership that won’t budge—there’s a reason. In this episode of the Emotionally Healthy Leader Podcast, I explore one of the most overlooked but powerful forces shaping your life and leadership: your family of origin.

The truth is, we all carry a family story. And unless we allow Jesus to meet us there—deep in those places—our leadership, relationships, and even our ability to hear God will be compromised.

I’ll walk you through how your family of origin influences your emotional maturity, your capacity to lead from your true self, and your ability to discern God’s voice. I’ll also share stories from my own journey and those of other leaders to help you recognize where you might be stuck—and how to move forward.

This is part one of a two-part series you don’t want to miss. The work of transformation begins with you.

 

Archives:
Tuesday May 28, 2019

Few leaders have an awareness of, let alone reflect on, the nature of their power. In this podcast, Pete shares a reading from the chapter on power and wise boundaries in The Emotionally Healthy Leader, discussing the complexity of dual relationships and power.

To download a free e-book on Six Marks of a Church Culture that Deeply Changes Lives visit www.emotionallyhealthy.org/churchculture.

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Tuesday May 21, 2019

Abraham and Sarah, out of their impatience, birthed a physical son - Ishmael. We too, out of our own impatience, often birth “Ishmaels” as well. This podcast explores The Ishmael Test, four questions to ask ourselves before we launch large decisions for God and his work.

To download a free e-book on Six Marks of a Church Culture that Deeply Changes Lives visit www.emotionallyhealthy.org/churchculture.

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Tuesday May 14, 2019

Reflecting on our mistakes and regrets can be a gift if we learn from them. This podcast is Part 2 of Pete's biggest regrets over the last 40 years of leadership. He shares 6 more regrets and discusses discretion (i.e. discernment) in leadership.

To download a free e-book on Six Marks of a Church Culture that Deeply Changes Lives visit www.emotionallyhealthy.org/churchculture.

 

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Tuesday May 07, 2019

Pete answers the question “what has been your greatest regret in leadership?” by sharing his top four regrets over the last 40 years. This is part 1 of a 2-part series.

To download a free e-book on Six Marks of a Church Culture that Deeply Changes Lives visit www.emotionallyhealthy.org/churchculture.

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Tuesday April 30, 2019

Pete talks about the ancient practice of the Daily Office as one powerful means to carve out sufficient time to be with Jesus and to be with ourselves – out of which we go and offer our lives as a gift to the world. This is not a superficial being simply to stay functional but to a deep waiting on Jesus – a life with deep stillness and silence that serves to center our leadership. He also breaks down one of his morning prayer times as a sample (being fully aware that each of us needs to find our own way) and leads a short Daily Office.

To download a free e-book on Six Marks of a Church Culture that Deeply Changes Lives visit www.emotionallyhealthy.org/churchculture.

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Tuesday April 23, 2019

Pete begins by talking about reading for wisdom and not simply for information – suggesting we re-learn how to read - then shares a list of key books he has read in last six to twelve months.

To download a free e-book on Six Marks of a Church Culture that Deeply Changes Lives visit www.emotionallyhealthy.org/churchculture.

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Tuesday April 16, 2019

It is possible to build a church, an organization, or a team by relying only on our gifts, talents, and experience. But Jesus says that our efforts are worth nothing unless they flow out of a relationship of loving union with him (John 15:5). In this podcast, Pete shares an excerpt from the audio version of The Emotionally Healthy Leader where he talks about slowing down for loving union with Jesus. Staying in communion with Jesus is the most important leadership issue for each of us. 

To download a free e-book on Six Marks of a Church Culture that Deeply Changes Lives visit www.emotionallyhealthy.org/churchculture.

   

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Tuesday April 09, 2019

Pete explores the sixth, and final, quality in this 6-part series on the marks of a church culture that deeply changes lives: every person in full-time ministry. After providing a broad theological overview of our calling and our work, Pete offers 5 specific applications for pastors/leaders to build a dynamic culture where people mature and are freed for God’s mission in their lives.

To download a free e-book on Church Culture Revolution: A 6-Part Vision that Deeply changes Lives visit www.emotionallyhealthy.org/churchculture.

 

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Tuesday April 02, 2019

Pete expands on the fifth quality of a church culture that deeply changes lives: passionate marriage and singleness. Christian marriage and singleness is different than secular marriage and singleness. Both have implications for multiplying disciples and building Christ-filled communities.

To download a free e-book on Church Culture Revolution: A 6-Part Vision that Deeply Changes Lives visit www.emotionallyhealthy.org/churchculture.

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Tuesday March 26, 2019

Pete expands on the fourth quality of a church culture that deeply changes lives: healthy community. In a church culture that changes lives, leaders prayerfully and thoughtfully model how to do relationships differently in the new family of Jesus. In this podcast, Pete offers six insights to building a healthy, transformative community.

To download a free e-book on Church Culture Revolution: A 6-Part Vision that Deeply Changes Lives visit www.emotionallyhealthy.org/churchculture.

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